Ooh the Nerve of People!
I am rejoicing with the rest of the nation over the amazing rescue of Ben Owenby and Shawn Hornbeck. And like everyone else I have questions, especially in the case of Shawn.
My intense fascination with this miracle does not mean I'm an insensitive dolt who derives a sick thrill out of a juicy story. I think that's safe to say about most people. It's human nature (which parenthood only compounds) to be curious and almost desperate to learn the whys and hows of something as stupefying as Shawn's story is turning out to be. Our safe little world of denial has been seriously unsettled; we're forced to face the undeniable fact that Shawn could've been our own child. Naturally we crave the details so we can somehow, some way, devise a perfect prevention plan to preclude ourselves from ever having the Akers' and Owenby's shoes double-tied on our own feet. AND THAT IS THE CRUX OF THE AKERS' MESSAGE.
Where then, do so many people get off thinking they have ANY right to pass judgement on Shawn or his parents?! The decisions they make for themselves are their own to make, and it's really none of our damn business if they want to spread their message through Oprah, Larry King, The View, American Idol or even Jerry Springer. Let them shout it loud and proud! And listen to them for cripes sakes! They are graciously sharing their story with us and we thank them by suggesting they are fame-seekers?! Ugh.
How can [collective] we say what we might do differently? Very very few of us have walked in their shoes. Almost none of us can comprehend the anguish and pain these families have suffered. Only THEY could ever understand their own motives and methods of coping, and I find it absolutely abominable for anyone to question or criticize them.
Personally, I am in complete awe of this family. Despite the atrocities Shawn may have faced for over 4 years, he did what he had to do to survive, and never lost hope that he would one day be reunited with his loved ones. That doe-eyed cutie has shown amazing strength, obviously stemming from a deep-seated faith his parents instilled at a young age. (I hope this serves to save him life-long agony.) He was a terrified, innocent child who was taken against his will. How dare we expect him to defend what he did or didn't do to outwit the twisted grown man Michael Devlin is [alleged to be]? Instead we should be up in arms, demanding to know how this nefarious crime was allowed to happen right under our noses. Several people went so far as to ask Shawn if he was Shawn! How could so-called friends fail this child so miserably by not coming forward with their suspicions?
As for Pam and Craig, how can I not admire them? They adopted a magnificent cause in an effort to cope with the anguish of not knowing where their son was, if he was dead or alive, if he was being mistreated, etc. I can not even begin to fathom what they went through then or now, much less how I might react myself. In the midst of enormous tragedy they selflessly dedicated themselves to searching for ALL missing children; working tirelessly to save parents everywhere from having to endure the same wretched pain they were bearing. Searching for the lost and preaching prevention is all they have known since Shawn disappeared. This cause means the world to them. I think they're courageous and brilliant to take advantage of the massive media attention to spread their message.
Bottom line: We have NO RIGHT to judge them. We are NOT entitled to answers. We are not Pam or Craig or Shawn. What they do or don't do is up to them alone. We should be grateful that they care so much about our children to put themselves "out there" like they have. We ought to be inspired by them and heed their message. Instead of speculating, second-guessing, and slamming these victims we should be standing and applauding them.
Thank you Pam, Craig, and Shawn from the bottom of my heart. Your tremendous sacrifices, your critical message, and the power of your hope have not been lost on this mom.
**************************************************
On a related side note: I want to share a picture of a boy from my hometown who has been missing for 17 years. His name is Jacob Wetterling and his information can be viewed by clicking here.
This young man went to school with my sister. I was a teenager at the time and I think it made me grow up faster than I might otherwise have. His disappearance drove home the realization that evil is real, and we never really know where it's lurking.
Now, I can't help but see similarities between his case and Shawn and Ben's, but then, there's never been another case I wanted so badly to be solved. What happened to you Jake?
My intense fascination with this miracle does not mean I'm an insensitive dolt who derives a sick thrill out of a juicy story. I think that's safe to say about most people. It's human nature (which parenthood only compounds) to be curious and almost desperate to learn the whys and hows of something as stupefying as Shawn's story is turning out to be. Our safe little world of denial has been seriously unsettled; we're forced to face the undeniable fact that Shawn could've been our own child. Naturally we crave the details so we can somehow, some way, devise a perfect prevention plan to preclude ourselves from ever having the Akers' and Owenby's shoes double-tied on our own feet. AND THAT IS THE CRUX OF THE AKERS' MESSAGE.
Where then, do so many people get off thinking they have ANY right to pass judgement on Shawn or his parents?! The decisions they make for themselves are their own to make, and it's really none of our damn business if they want to spread their message through Oprah, Larry King, The View, American Idol or even Jerry Springer. Let them shout it loud and proud! And listen to them for cripes sakes! They are graciously sharing their story with us and we thank them by suggesting they are fame-seekers?! Ugh.
How can [collective] we say what we might do differently? Very very few of us have walked in their shoes. Almost none of us can comprehend the anguish and pain these families have suffered. Only THEY could ever understand their own motives and methods of coping, and I find it absolutely abominable for anyone to question or criticize them.
Personally, I am in complete awe of this family. Despite the atrocities Shawn may have faced for over 4 years, he did what he had to do to survive, and never lost hope that he would one day be reunited with his loved ones. That doe-eyed cutie has shown amazing strength, obviously stemming from a deep-seated faith his parents instilled at a young age. (I hope this serves to save him life-long agony.) He was a terrified, innocent child who was taken against his will. How dare we expect him to defend what he did or didn't do to outwit the twisted grown man Michael Devlin is [alleged to be]? Instead we should be up in arms, demanding to know how this nefarious crime was allowed to happen right under our noses. Several people went so far as to ask Shawn if he was Shawn! How could so-called friends fail this child so miserably by not coming forward with their suspicions?
As for Pam and Craig, how can I not admire them? They adopted a magnificent cause in an effort to cope with the anguish of not knowing where their son was, if he was dead or alive, if he was being mistreated, etc. I can not even begin to fathom what they went through then or now, much less how I might react myself. In the midst of enormous tragedy they selflessly dedicated themselves to searching for ALL missing children; working tirelessly to save parents everywhere from having to endure the same wretched pain they were bearing. Searching for the lost and preaching prevention is all they have known since Shawn disappeared. This cause means the world to them. I think they're courageous and brilliant to take advantage of the massive media attention to spread their message.
Bottom line: We have NO RIGHT to judge them. We are NOT entitled to answers. We are not Pam or Craig or Shawn. What they do or don't do is up to them alone. We should be grateful that they care so much about our children to put themselves "out there" like they have. We ought to be inspired by them and heed their message. Instead of speculating, second-guessing, and slamming these victims we should be standing and applauding them.
Thank you Pam, Craig, and Shawn from the bottom of my heart. Your tremendous sacrifices, your critical message, and the power of your hope have not been lost on this mom.
**************************************************
On a related side note: I want to share a picture of a boy from my hometown who has been missing for 17 years. His name is Jacob Wetterling and his information can be viewed by clicking here.
This young man went to school with my sister. I was a teenager at the time and I think it made me grow up faster than I might otherwise have. His disappearance drove home the realization that evil is real, and we never really know where it's lurking. Now, I can't help but see similarities between his case and Shawn and Ben's, but then, there's never been another case I wanted so badly to be solved. What happened to you Jake?
posted by Sheila at 6:26 AM
5 Comments:
Well said!!!!
I too am from MN (southwestern) & know the Wetterling story. Very tragic, can't imagine what it would be like to have a personal connection to something like this. I too commend the families for coming forward & sharing what they choose at their own timing.
These parents are gonna need every cent they make on these shows to cope with the bills they will have from the phyciatrist bills if they truly hope to get thir sons back! They have been molested and are now caught in the cycle of sexual predation...What was done to them they will one day do !
Lets all pray that thus will stay a joy forever
Very well put! I agree that the families involved will need every penny to help their children cope and to overcome (hopefully) the horrors they faced. Hopefully they can break the cycle that had been so wickedly forced on them.
I too remember the day Jacob was abducted. I was 15 years old. Very scary stuff. I still live in the area and still think about it all the time. You are right - no one has a right to judge the family for any decision they have made.
"There, but for the grace of God, go I" and "judge not lest ye be judged". The boys were found just minutes from my home. I cannot imagine the horror and heartbreak these families have endured. You said it very well, thank you!
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